Don't Make Me Count To Three: a Mom's Look at Heart Oriented Discipline - by Ginger Plowman

One day while looking at books on Amazon.com, I came across this book by Ginger Plowman. Being frustrated with the actions of my children and our discipline techniques that didn't seem to be working, I decided to borrow this book from the library (which I like to do with any book if I can before I decide to buy it). I am glad that I did.

The book starts by defining discipline.

"Biblical discipline involves love, the heart, and God's Word. Because God is concerned with the issues of the heart, biblical discipline involves much more than outward behavior. Biblical discipline gets to the heart of the problem." (pg 26)

We have Ted Tripp's book Shepherding a Child's Heart which is an excellent book on heart oriented discipline (I would recommend it as well), but it didn't offer much practical how-to's to a mom of young children like me. That's what I loved the most about Don't Make Me Count To Three, Ginger Plowman gives a lot of practical how-to's and plenty of examples. She walks you through how to develop your skills at probing the heart of your child (even young children. Ginger gives examples of her own daughter at 3 years old), how to train your children to think like Christians, how to use God's Word for reproof and correction, and how to Biblically use the "rod." She also includes sections on how to lead your child to Christ, and how to pray for your child.

Since applying the principles in this book to our own family, I can honestly say that I can see a difference not just in my children but also in myself. I still struggle with consistency, frustration, and at times disciplining in anger; and I can tell you that disciplining in those sinful states is ineffective. I am glad that God is patiently working on me. By His grace I am being molded to be more like Him. That is another point to be made about "Heart-oriented" discipline. In order for the heart of the child to be properly affected, the heart of the parent must right as well.

This is also a great book for Dad to read too. My husband read as far as he could before I had to return it to the library and really apprieciated the practical tips that were given. Not to mention that it is important for both husband and wife to be on the same page when it comes to training children.

I have added this book and it's companion Wise Words for Moms (a guide to heart issues, heart probing questions, and scripture verses to use in discipline) to my every growing book wish list.